Forever Chained

Light Yagami has finally done it. Kira has defeated L. He is the god of the new age. God of his perfect world... But... It's not perfect. It can never be perfect. Because there's one thing missing.
L. The only person he could ever have fallen for...
Light is torn with regret. What will he do now that he has gained the world, but lost everything?

Disclaimer: Yeah yeah, I don't own Death Note. If I did, episode 25 would have ended MUCH differently. As for the characters... I WISH.

Chapter 1

Regret

by: Lawli_pop
The cold night air stung against my skin as I stared into a moonlit sky. The only sounds besides my own breathing were tree branches blowing in the wind and crickets singing through the otherwise quiet darkness. Streetlamps glowed a bright orange against the black pavement that shone from a previous rain. Small raindrops spat down on me as I pulled my uniform jacket tighter around myself.
Straight, brown locks of hair fell in front of my face when I looked back down at a reflective pool of rainwater in front of where my feet rested on the ground. I kicked a rock gently, rolling it through the once still water, sending small waves ripping through a dark resemblance of myself. I stared at my ruined reflection as it waved from up and down in an attempt to steady itself. I blinked hard. Tears blurred my vision and I fought hard to keep them from falling.
Now what? I was Kira. I had everything I wanted. But why did I feel so... alone? Well... after thinking over the subject I realized I had everything except the one thing I had just days earlier debated with myself about wheather I would be able to live without. I now knew I could never live without it. I had done the wrong thing. And I could never forgive myself.
My memories returned to that one thing. The only person who could have ever stopped me from being God of the new world. ...Lawliet.
Ryuuga Hideki. L. Ryuuzaki. The greatest detective the world had ever known. The best friend I had ever had. I could admit that now. Had anyone asked me about my relationship with the panda-eyed detective, I would have denied any suggestion that we had ever been anything other than detective and suspect. Nothing more.
Regret tugged at me with all its might. L had, in fact, been much more than that. Everything about him was unique. The way he sat, how he held things, the dark lines beneath his obsidian eyes, his odd obsession with cake and strawberries... His occasional smile... The soft lips that had once captivated my own. The smooth touch and fragile, warm body that I had so often found lying against my own. No. The genious detective was not just my rival. L had been the only person to ever capture my true affection. The only one who thought as similarly as myself. He had loved me, like no one had ever before. And... I had fallen in love with him.
I gave up trying to hide the tears tha had welled up in my eyes and allowed them to stream down my face. The razor sharp wind cut into my skin as I sat on the bench. But I didn't care. It didn't matter if I froze to death. Everything about my life seemed so pointless with L gone. And it was all my fault. The competition was gone. The love was gone. The warmth and comfort I had once felt with him in my arms... was gone. I could never get it back. Was being Kira, God of the new age, the new world, was it really worth killing the only person I had ever loved? Was it truly worth living the rest of my life without the strange detective that had brought me so much joy? But it was done. I, Light Yagami, was Kira. And I, "Light-kun", had killed L Lawliet. A truely great friend that was gone forever. I had killed him- watched him die... and laughed. How could I have been so full of myself? So heartless and stupid that I would kill the only person I truly cared about in order to rule a world full of criminals? What was wrong with me? Had I not realized the truth of what I had done? All along, I had been murdering people. Criminals, but still people. That made me a murderer. Made ME a criminal. L had been right all along. About everything. I was just a selfish, cold-hearted murderer. A criminal. I wondered for a moment... If I was a murderer.... Didn't I deserve to die?
The rain still poured lightly, not strong enough to soak me, but enough to give my honey brown hair a shine.
I pulled the Death Note out the inside of my jacket, along with a pen. Carefully opening the notebook to a page in the center, I placed the pen in the middle of the paper, touching one of the many horizontal stripes lining the page.
A raindrop landed on the end of the pen, and I watched with emotionless eyes as it quickly trickled down onto the white paper.
It was pointless going on like this. I was just like one of them...
The pen began moving, guided by my hand, drawing slow lines to create letters. Soon a whole name had been written down.
"Light Yagami."
I set the book down beside me in a puddle of water, the expencive, black fountain pen resting neatly on top. I had 40 seconds left to live.
39...
38...
37...
Time was slowly ticking by. I remembered what Ryuuk had told me about people who used Death Notes. You don't go to either Heaven or Hell. I imagined blank, empty darkness. I figured I would probably just die. Cease existing. Eternal... Nothingness.
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
Almost there. I had truly lost. Kira had lost a fight he thought he had won. I would never have won. Not if I could never see Lawliet again.
3...
2...
1...
My eyes widened as a sudden pain hit my chest. I couldn't breathe. I tried to get a gasp of air, but failed every time. I held my hands on the searing pain in my heart, pulling and ripping at my shirt as if it would help.
I tumbked to the ground as the rain fell harder. My struggling body began to get heavier, and soon it was so heavy I couldn't move, athletic and strong as I was. I was unable to even try to breathe. Trying and gasping required muscle movement- something I lacked the ability to control at the moment.
I was lying still on the ground. I felt my eyes closing and life slowly slipping away as I fell into an endless pit if darkness.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Black. Everything was black. There were no walls, no ceiling, no floor. No light whatsoever, but I could clearly see every detail of my hands as I held them up in front if my face.
I looked around. There was nothing for miles. Just black darkness surrounding me. Where was I? Had I even died yet? Was this some kind of dream? I looked down at myself and was surprised to see that I wasn't wearing a shirt.
Well, I HAD ripped it off earlier when I had been struggling to breathe.
Huh. When I thought about it, I still wasn't breathing. I guess I really was dead. I had no need to breathe. But... Where was I? I repeatedly asked myself this quetion. It wasn't Hell. But it certainly wasn't heaven either.
Suddenly, a voice snapped me out of my thoughts.
"Light-kun?"
I whipped around. Standing almost three feet in front of me was the last thing I expected to see. I looked the person up and down.
Blue jeans, white shirt, black, jagged hair, dark eyes.
Unexplainable fear and joy filled within me as I stared wide-eyed at the amazed detective before me.
"L-Lawliet?"






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I WILL be continuing this fanfic, so any recommendations and comments are really appreciated! Please rate and review!

Next chapter: In Limbo

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