These are my confessions! {Intro}

So I was listening to Confessions by Usher and it inspired me to do this:
So these are my confessions! Or at least these are some of them....
Some of them are stupid..
Some silly..
Some are even really dark and depressing.... xP

Chapter 1

{Insert awesome chapter title here}

Confession 1: I hide my pain behind my sense of humor.
If you know about Zach then this will be easier to explain, and if you don't read my About Me.
Yes, I hide. When I talk about Zach I insult him, I joke, I laugh. But secretly it hurts! I cry, I wake up wishing I could go back... And this isn't just with him, it is with all the pain I feel... I like to think I can be a funny person but a lot of the times when I'm telling jokes and messing around it's just to hide the hurt inside.

Confession 2: I'm actually a really mean person. Most of the time I am just joking when I'm being mean but I mean it sometimes too. There are certain people that I wish I could punch in the face. I get mad easily and if you make me mad I can be a major bitch!

Confession 3: I'm actually a really bitter person... You guys on here might not realize but I am... But it's weird cause I laugh way too much for how bitter I am. And I think that goes back to confession 1.

Confession 4: I hate every single person in my high school except for like ten people... Again back to confession 3. Lol

Confession 5: I actually kind of hate myself.... I'm really insecure and dislike almost everything about myself...

Confession 6: I am terrified of getting old(er) and the future scares the shiz out of me!

Confession 7: My family has no idea who I really am.... (mostly my mom)
Most of the stuff I just told you my family doesn't know about me... My family doesn't even know that I like to write! They don't know how much I dislike myself.... They don't know how much pain I hide (I guess that one is my fault...)
They're about 80% clueless of what goes on inside of my head...

Confession 8: I don't know if this counts as a confession because it can be kind of obvious.... But I am super weird! Teehee!

Confession 9: I absolutely hate my laugh and my sneeze. I have been made fun of them for years!! And it irritates me that every time I sneeze someone has to ask, "Was that a sneeze?" No idiot, I just felt like making a random squeaking noise! Shut up!

Confession 10: I am majorly antisocial. Like I said in C4 and C1.... I hate talking to people I don't know...

Confession 11: I have severe performance anxiety.

Confession 12: I actually am dyslexic....

Confession 13: I use to be really depressed and use cut myself... But I've stopped now. My scars have even gone away... I handle my pain in better ways now.... Like writing...

Confession 14: I have attempted suicide. The last time was a week before I found out my brother died.... I am thankful every single day that I did not go through with it because if I had that would have been two children my mother would have lost and I know she could handle that.

Confession 15: I do not believe in God. I am not religious in any way. But I will respect you and your religion so please return the favor and respect me and my lack of a religion.

Confession 16: I do wear a cross around my neck every day (I think you can see it in the pictures of me in my Photo Album) but it is not because of God. It is a ash necklace that holds Zach's ashes. It even has his name engraved on the back. (I didn't choose the necklace, my sister did).

Confession 17: I have no religious beliefs except for one. I do believe in reincarnation. Don't ask why cause it is hard to explain but I do. And no that doesn't make me Hindu or Buddhist....

Confession 18: I have trouble opening up sometimes...

Confession 19: This is getting wayyyyyy too long!! I'm going to go...! Bye!




Side note: I am not looking for attention with this... I just thought it was a nice idea.. And it lets you really get to know me better. Please no rude comments or anything like that... I love you all..! :D

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