Living Like You're Not There

I apologize ahead of time if my story starts getting a little fast paced. I tend to do that sometimes >.< I hope you enjoy it. It's based off my life with a slight twist. I'm sort of writing this with no ending in mind so I will gladly take suggestions ^-^ Do not read if you're homophobic. Thank you!

Chapter 1


by: Haystacks
I remember the snow, the crisp air, and the trees dead limbs. I remember looking at the tree in wonder thinking if its life was worth living and if its death had meaning and if it was any different than any of the other trees. Was I anything like this tree?
I snuggled my nose into the warm red wool of my scarf and stuffed my padded hands into the pockets of my puffed winter jacket. I squeezed my eyes shut trying to keep from shaking. It wasn’t just the cold nipping at me but the police on my tail. I’m not a delinquent, I hadn’t done anything wrong. I was just different.
It started when I was a freshman in high school. I had my new white dress freshly cleaned and pressed and the white fabric roses around the middle fluffed to its most pristine. I felt beautiful and elegant. I stood out, of course, from all the other girls but that wasn’t new to me, that’s just who I was. My hair was cropped short at my ear and dyed a bright pink with purple highlights. It sounds strange and, possibly, ugly but I pulled it off quite nicely.
My eyes were caked with black eyeliner and mascara in my attempt at trying to look the least bit decent. I loved every part of my but my face. My nose was too big, my eyes too small, my eyelashes too short, my lips too skinny, and my acne too wild.
I walked into the freshly cleaned building and immediately smelled the strong scent of cheap perfume and makeup. My friend, Crystal, flounced up to me from outside, her blonde curls bouncing perfectly on her shoulders. The way she used yellow and pink eye shadow really brought out her blue eyes that morning. She was wearing a short pink flowy skirt that she could never stress enough had shorts underneath.
“Ryan! Omg, did you see the new guy from England? He is so hot!” Her usual greeting.
I just chuckled and rolled my eyes. “I still can’t believe how many students come in in the middle of the year. It’s just crazy.”
“You’re crazy.” She joked. “I love it! There’s always new cute guys!”
I had never had a boyfriend in my life. Boys just found me strange and hard to talk to, which is understandable. But I do dream of it; someone who’d love me and understand me and not care how I looked. Crystal has had at least ten boyfriends in two years. She goes through them like a sick person goes through tissues. It’s not her fault, though; she just has had really bad luck. They’ve all been rude and cruel and not good for her. Her last boyfriend barely paid attention to her at all. I didn’t know why she was with him in the first place, he wasn’t even that cute.
“Ryan!” I felt someone pounce onto my back.
I made a high screeching sound and turned around quickly and angrily. “Luke! Do not jump on me like that!”
He just laughed. “Don’t be so melancholy.”
“Haha. You’ve been going to English call, I see.” I said sarcastically.
He just rolled his eyes and walked away. As he went I shivered wishing I could wash of the residue of him off my back.
“You know he just has a crush on you.” Crystal said smiling playfully.
“Yeah but he’s creepy and gross and has no friends.” I said taking out my hand sanitizer.
“You’re so mean.” She joked giggling.
“Well I don’t like him and I think he’s stalking me.” I wiped some hand sanitizer on my bare back.
I have known Luke as long as I could remember and he’s been acting like we are best friends. I would feel bad for him if he wasn’t so creepy. His dark brown hair never looked washed and he had what looked like a beer belly.
“So anyways….” I start to change the subject on our way up the stairs to Crystal’s locker. “You gunna talk to the new guy from England?”
“I don’t know. I’m too nervous.” She said looking down.
I sighed deeply. I never understood why she got so nervous talking to guys she found attractive. Once she’d start talking to them she has full control over them. By the next day of talking to her they’d be asking her for her hand in marriage. I always found the way her and her boyfriend would talk about getting married on at least their first date.
“I’ll talk to him.” I offered.
Crystal hummed doubtfully. “I don’t know…”
“Just say hi to him. I bet he’d appreciate it.”
She blushed a rose pink. “You’re so weird, Ryan!”
I chuckled again.

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