The Girl Who Wished To Be Skinny

I guess you could say this is kind of a true story... Some of the things in it could be similar to things that have happened to me.... :(

Chapter 1

Doctors Office

I woke up to the sound of my alarm. I looked around the room and saw box's everywhere. I just rolled over and layed there for a while, thinking to myself. It was summer and almost time to go back to school. All the other kids were going to be enjoying there last week of summer break, but I wouldnt. I would be stuck at home most of the time unpacking, helping my mom do things and decorating my room. Not that I was really used to having friends or anything like that anyway. We'd just moved. I liked our old house better, but it was to expensive and my mom couldnt afford it any more.

I hated the new house, it was ugly. It wasnt home, I'd called our old house home scince I was about three years old. My dad died when I was ten though and ever scince then everything had been kind of rough on me and my mom. I pretty much hated my life and I wanted to die to. The pressure got to me at school. People knew what happened to my dad and they just picked on me about it.

Theyed say "Your dad died because he didnt want a daughter like you. A worthless, ugly, stupid, fat biitch!" When they did I would just run out of the class and lock myself in the bathroom or that day when I went home I would cry. I would try to tell the teachers, but they just made fun of me to. They didnt care what happened to me. I wouldnt tell my mom or family about it, so I just stayed quiet.

I glanced at the clock again and decided I should get up. I got out of bed and went into the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and then got into the shower. I got out and then got dressed. I looked in the mirror when I was ready and though To ugly! To fat! Then I walked out of the bathroom. I went into the living room with my mom. She was sitting on the couch and was waiting for me.

She said "You look pretty! Lets go, before your late for the doctors appointment." I didnt say anything and thought Yeah right and I hate the doctors! We both went outside and got into the car. The doctors office wasnt that far away, so it didnt take that long to get there. We both went in and then sat in the waiting room. Soon the nurse came and got me.

She took me back into the doctors office and said "The doctor will be with you shortly!" and then she left. I looked around the room and saw a window. I thought about opening it and leaving through it, but I probably wouldnt fit through it. Then I just sat there a few more minutes and the door opened. A male doctor walked in.

I thought Oh great, a guy, just to make this more painful! I thought my mom requested a female to be my doctor today! He siad "Hey, how are you today?" I said "Hi.. not good.." He said "Oh im sorry, I hope everything gets better. Could you please take off your shoes and step on the scale over here." I took off my shoes and then stepped on the scale. I hate being weighed! I thought

When the scale finally balanced it read 230 pounds. I looked at it in discust and then at the doctor. He wrote down my weight and then told me I could step off. I stepped off and then he measured my height and body fat. Then he checked my blood preassure and heart beat. He did a few other things to. Then he told me we were through and I could put my shoes back on and leave. I put them back on and then walked out the door.

As soon as I did I heared him say "Damn shes fat and ugly!" and he didnt think I could hear him. I turned around and said "Yeah I am, and your a ball-less fvcking jerk!" He looked at me like he was mad and shocked. Then I turned around an went to get my mom so we could just leave. I got her and then we went home. On the way there I though about my weight and my looks. I started to cry and soon we were home.

I quickly wiped away my tears before my mom saw them and then I went inside to my room. I layed on my bed and sobbed into my pillow. A while after that I got up and started to unpack. I got out cloths and began putting them in draws. Once I did that I started to hang cloths in my closet. When I was done with my cloths I started to hang up posters.

When I was done with that I started to put other things in places and unpack the rest of my stuff. I got my laptop out and plugged it up to charge. I hid my diary in the draw on my nightstand. I put my book bag and shoes in my closet and put a few other decorations on my dresser and desk. I put extra school supplies in my desk and then I put my make-up in my bathroom and some other things on my dresser.

After that I was done with my room. I went out of my room to find my mom, she was in her room unpacking cloths. She'd already hung up pictures and put stuff away. So cloths were the only thing she had left, in her room atleast. I walked in her room and when she saw me she said "What!" I said "Nothing." I could tell she was in a bad mood, so I just left. I went back to my room and shut the door.

It was getting dark outside and I checked to see what time it was. It was 8:30. I wasnt hungry, eventough I hadnt eaten anything all day. I knew my mom would make me eat some time soon, but I didnt want to. I went to my nightstand to see if my laptop was charged. It wasnt all the way and I didnt really want to get on it anyway. I got out my sketch book and started to draw.

I knew I wasnt good for anything else, but I could draw and paint pretty descent. I'd hung on picture in my room and it was something I painted. It was actually one of the few things I was proud of. It was of a girl whith her face wet with tears and twisted with fear. The backround was a dark night with most of the moon covered by clouds. I liked it because It kind of described how I felt most of the time. My mom didnt like or understand the painting, but I didnt care.

I drew for a little bit and then my mom came in my room. I said "Dont you kncok?" She said "Sorry, but you need to eat something!" I said "Im not hungry." She said "I dont care, your going to eat something, now come on!" I didnt say anything and I walked out of the room with her. I went into the kitchen and fixed a hot pocked. My mom said "You've got to eat more then that!" I said "I told you im not hungry!"

She walked over and fixed the other hot pocket. She made me eat both and then I went back to my room. I got on my laptop and went on twitter. I stayed on for a while and then I got bored. I went to change cloths. Eventhough it was only 10:00, I decided to get in bed. When I did, I just layed there and stared at the ceiling for a while. I Was used to no noise at all during the night, because I used to live in the middle of nowhere. Now all I heared at night was noise, we lived in town now. I finally fell asleep around 10:40.

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