Lovestruck with commentary

I think we have My Immortal in reverse, written by Tara's Baby Danni, so Rachie221 and I are adding commentary to this monstrosity some one is trying to call a story.

Chapter 1

Chapter one

by: Teagzi
Hey!My name is Dabria Kathrine Ashleigh Tucker-Price(Your name is stupidly long), but everyone calls me Bambi because of my big green eyes.I have Long sun kissed golden hair that falls into perfect curls and sun kissed clear skin and I amslim, but have perfect curves in all of the right places(Sure you do, just keep telling yourself that).I attend howarts and am in Gryfindore, in my seventh year.I wear MINISKIRTS or shorts everyday and sometimes tight skinny jeans, cool DRESSES, i wear TOPS, SCARVES, necklaces, HIGH HEELS.I love TARTAN clothes especially dresses n skirts.I paint my NAILS everyday and wear a little bit of make up, just fondation, blue eyeliner(not alot I dont want to look like a f^king emo(What did the poor emos do to you?), eyeshadow and lipgloss(Wow so interesting.....

Today I am wearing a tight, low cut floral minidress that clung to my body and Black high heels that made my long, slim legs look even longer(Egotistical much?).I walked to the Great hall and spotted my goerguos, blonde, frind Candi Alexandra Hayley Smith(A/N:Hayley thats you babe!) at the Slytherine table.

In her first year she got sorted in to the Slytherin house and hates it.i sat down next 2 her nd got dirty loks from the slytherins, so i puled the finger at was wearing a tight wite tank top and denim booty shorts that she looked uber hot in"I f^king hat it here all th slytherins are bitccy emos!"Candi saied to me"lets move to your table."We stood and were stopped by Draco Malfoy the hottest boy in existence, well for a emo slytherin."Hey girls,"he said sexily"MCR are playing in Hogsmede tonight,(Yeah, a muggle band is really going to have a concert in a wizard town) I'll meet you here at eight."wihout thinkig I said"Yes."and Candi gasped.

Candi gasped(Didn't I just read that?) and pulled me away from Draco"You can't go to MCR with draca!Hes a stypid emo!And do you even know what mcr is?!!!11'

"Noo!Of corse not, Candi whats MCr?"I assked

"A f^king emo band i f^king hate them!"

"Excuse me, are you guys talking about MCR?I heard Drako wanted to take you."said a stypid emo slytherine called pansy.(Are all Slytherinies emo now?)

"Yeah, why the f^c do you care?"Candi shoted(It was just a question, no need to shout, or shot)

"Well i thought you might not fit in well with the of the other ppl at the concert, I mean lok at how ur dressed!'pansy said pointing at our cute cloths(Cloths? Like what you use to wipe tables?)"I could help if you want."

Fine."I siad bak and then we went into da slytherinies(Do I really have to say something for that?) commen roam.

Pansy lent us sum clothes and i put mine were a skirt that had skulls on it and sum black fishnets wif rips nd sum conberse shoes and a black tank tup wit MCR on it(wow soooo emo snorts hehe). I started to puttput(t) mah hare in a messy bun(why would you do that to a poor innocent lil bunny?) but ponsy stopped me.

"I ned to spray paint it black first!"she said and i gosped.

"You are not painting my hare black!'i yeilied

"fin!I wil just put in sum streaks."she said bac

By eght I lookd fantastically(Fantastical was an amazing word until you ruined it) emo and went to the gret hal to meet draco with Candi, she loked emo as well she was wearing a leather mini dress and red fishnets and concerse shoes with black liggloss and blac hd did her haire black.

"Thank you Pansy,you are a life saver we would have looked so stypid without you."Candi sasid(I think she made you look worse)

"I know!We could spell your name with a i so its pansi instead of Pansy."(WTF why would she want to spell her name like that?)

Pansi Smiled at us"It was no probelm bye!'and she ran off

""Rite ready to go?I assed(Assed?) candi

"Yup!"she said back and we walked sexily(Don't you mean swexily?) into the great hal(I'm pretty sure Hal wants you to get out).

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