Dear blank. Please blank.

Teehee :3

Chapter 1

Dear therapist,
I might actually come see you if your job title didn't spell out "the rapist"
Sincerely, not lying down

Dear boy with a black eye,
When I say that I'm not ticklish it means DON'T TOUCH ME.
Sincerely, tiny girl with an epic right hook

Dear Edward,
Real immortals drink unicorn blood.
Sincerely, Voldemort

Dear Voldemort,
Should've used me as a horcrux.
Sincerely, Waldo

Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely, Logic

Dear Students,
I know when you're texting.
Sincerely, No one just looks down at their crotch and smiles

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