101 Reasons Why Harry Potter is Superior to Twilight

This is NOT MINE. I repeat. NOT MINE.
But whoever wrote this is a genius.

Chapter 1

HARRY POTTER!!!!!!!!!!!!

2.There is a larger variety of characters. It is a plethora of magical folk.
3.J.K. Rowling is a better writer.
4.It is not a sappy love story.
5.Appeals to boys and girls.
6.Appeals to kids and adults.
7.What scares you more LORD VOLDEMORT or James?
8.Rowling created her own world. Meyer used an already existing one.
9.Hermione is an independent, smart young woman, whereas Bella is a clingy, needy child.
10.Richer plot.
11.The Harry Potter series ended in a more realistic way. What I mean was, there were casualties. Fred died; George got his ear cut off; Dumbledore and Sirius died. Somehow in the Twilight series, Bella ended up with everything she could have wanted - a perfect life.
12.Harry, Ron and Hermione mature as the book progressed. Bella, if possible, became more childish.
13.Meyer’s werewolves are wimps. Fenrir Greyback? He’s got cajones!
14.Twilight is FAR too predictable!
15.Rowling’s characters have believable flaws.
16.There is actually humor in Harry Potter.
17.The characters are not entirely evil or entirely good.
18.There are clues put in the first books that will eventually have a great significance later on.
19.Rowling develops background knowledge for each of her characters.
20.Stephen King has never told J.K. Rowling that she cannot write.
21.Robert Pattinson plays a better character in Harry Potter than Twilight. (He has admitted that he, too, does not like Edward.)
22.Rowling does not describe the perfect man to be possessive, abusive, over-protective or stalker-like.
23.Bella gets everything she wants. Harry and his friends must make sacrifices.
24.Harry Potter is like a bag of chips. They are greasy and satisfying. Twilight is like rice cakes. They lack flavor and no one really wants to eat them.
25.Little details in Harry Potter turn out to be significant later.
26.Do we really need to hear how “beautiful” Edward is?
27.Twilight promotes necrophilia. (Breaking Dawn)
28.There are no clichés.
29.Quidditch v. Baseball. You decide.
30.There are no annoying love triangles.
31.There are no pedophiles
32.Harry Potter is full of surprises and leaves you clinging to Rowling’s every word.
33.Harry is loyal to his friends. Bella abandons her when she meets “the love of her existence”.
34.Look at the school bullies: Draco Malfoy and Lauren. All Lauren really does is make faces at Bella and rolls her eyes. Draco fr/e/aking tries to kill Harry. Winner? Mmmmm, I’m thinking Draco.
35.JK Rowling EXPLAINS everything. Why Snape hated Harry but saved his life whenever he was in trouble. Why Ludo Bagman kept helping Harry. Why Draco turned out to be so insecure... It isn't like that in Twilight. Some things are explained and some things are not. Connect the pieces; please... it makes a story better.
36.More interesting chapter headings.
37.Rowling fights. Meyer talks it out. 50 points for Rowling!
38.Besides her clinginess, Bella does not resemble a real teenager.
39.The characters have more colorful names, i.e. Luna Lovegood, Albus Dumbledore, and Viktor Krum v. Mike, Angela, and Jessica.
40.Even the secondary characters are endearing.
41.Twilight in NO WAY a forbidden love like Romeo and Juliet.
42.Bella, after having NO experience in relationships, decides that the first handsome boy she meets is her soul mate. Harry, after a brief period with Cho Chang, falls for his best friend’s sister, who also happens to be his friend as well.
43.Meyer is a firm believer in “tell, don’t show”.
44.Meyer likes to make up her own rules, while Rowling researches old lore and ancient beliefs.
45.Harry is not a stalker. He has never watched Ginny in her sleep.
46. The Cullens are idolized and envied, whereas Harry, Ron and Hermione have many friends, but they also have a lot of enemies. What’s life without conflict?
47.Edward is a 100-year-old virgin.
48.Rowling obviously knows how to edit her writing.
49.Hermione is always shown studying or reading and getting top marks in all her classes. Bella somehow manages to pass all of her classes without doing any homework. Hmmm…
50.Ginny understood that Harry needed to fight Voldemort, and accepted it. Bella made a fuss and didn’t let Edward protect the town against a swarm of vampires.
51.No one dies in Twilight.
52.Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry v. Forks High School. PWN!
53.Edward can’t read Bella’s thoughts because she doesn’t have any.
54.Twilight teaches kids that abusiveness is "selflessness".
55.Meyers attempt at creepy characters was an epic fail.
56.Bella fears that she will be older than Edward, impossible; Edward is over 100 years old. She will NEVER be older than him. Ever.
57.Twilight has driven girls to become very hostile.
58.When Twilight fans dress up as the characters, you can’t tell because they dress like regular people. When Potter fans dress up, you can’t miss them.
59.Harry's parents are dead, unlike Bella's parents who of course don't die because they have nothing to do with the story.
60.Charlie should have been arrested for neglect when he clearly saw that his daughter was depressed and did not get her into counseling.
61.The old people in Harry Potter actually look old.
62.The Death Eaters succeeded in killing Albus Dumbledore :( The Volturi did not manage to kill Edward.
63.Vampires can’t apparate.
64.Voldemort is so evil, that people do not speak his name. Can’t say the same for the Volturi.
65.Twilight is extremely s/e/xist and encourages women to submit to the “superiority” of men and prevent them from becoming strong independent figures like Ginny or Hermione or Professor McGonagall.
66.The Cullens have been around for hundreds of years and the ONLY thing they can think of to do all day is go to high school?
67.One character in Harry Potter has more complexity than ALL of the Twilight characters put together.
68.Meyer gave away the ENTIRE plot of the book by putting the quote on the back of the book. Really, all you need to do is read the back and that’s all you need to know about Twilight.
69.Twilight spoofs are better than the original. Harry Potter spoofs are funny, but the original is always number one!
70.Harry. Potter. Puppet. Pals.
71.Many Potter fans grew up along with Harry, Ron and Hermione. Therefore creating a connection with them, Twilight will NEVER be able to duplicate.
72."And Fred's eyes stared without seeing, the ghost of his last smile still etched upon his face." HOW DOES THAT NOT MAKE YOU CRY?!?!?!?!
73.Harry Potter doesn’t advertise suicide.
74.Snakes talk.
75.Harry Potter titles make sense. How did Meyer come up with her titles? Did she pull them out of her butt?
76.People remain loyal to each other in HP. Jacob left his family for a person who didn’t love him. Alice left her family without telling them just to follow a hunch.
77.In Harry Potter, even the bad guys are likable. I felt only revulsion towards the “villains” in Twilight.
78.Harry sacrificed himself to save the people he loved. Bella hid behind Edward.
79.Harry didn’t have to be hot for people to like him. But Twilight fans must constantly be reminded that Edward is hot.
80.There is no comic relief in Twilight.
81.If the assumption that Bella and Edward are like Romeo and Juliet, they would have had to die. James and Lily died to protect their son.
82.Harry Potter has Helena Bonham Carter. Twilight just can’t compete with that.
83.Harry didn’t fall in love with Ginny because she was perfect of beautiful.
84.What does Meyer mean by “reading too much into it”? Isn’t that what a book is for?
85.Rowling uses a varied vocabulary. Meyer uses “chagrin”.
86.Harry Potter fans don’t put a Z at the end of every plural noun.
87."A dream inspired me to write Twilight." - Stephenie Meyer
"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live" - Albus Dumbledore
88.JK Rowling is not afraid to kill her characters.
89.Harry Potter has the support of My Life is Average. Twilight had to create its own website to get any recognition.
90.Bella can’t go five minutes without tripping over something. I think I know who would win in a duel.
91.Potter fans do not try to kill others who express a different opinion than their own.
92.Meyer failed to realize that men are not referred to as “beautiful”. No male character was described a beautiful in Harry Potter.
93.Twilight stole “Black” and “Clearwater”.
94.Twilight doesn’t have a theme song.
95.JK Rowling doesn’t abandon her characters.
96.Twilight is Stephenie Meyer’s sexual fantasy. JK Rowling came up with Harry Potter.
97.There are two real fight scenes in Twilight.
98.There are no good insults in Twilight. Whereas mudblood…
99.Harry Potter has never ruined friendships.
100.Bella blatantly disregards her father’s rules by letting Edward into her room at night. Harry Potter instills better family values than Twilight.
101.Draco Malfoy. (In the style of A Very Potter Musical)


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