Keeping Taylor's Promises.
A Short Story.
Love, Loss, and Moving On.
Here is my attempt at a short story! I'd really appreciate it if you RATED it! :D Comments would be wonderful too...but I REALLY want rates!!! Please?
Also, a link to the song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOh1pocSwpE
Enjoy! Comment and rate please!!!
Ugh, unfortunately I had to make it two chapters to fit it all too...so sorry for that!
Keeping Taylor's Promises.
Forgotten days: the days that arenâ€™t important, nothing special or exciting. Nothing worth remembering.
Remembered days: sometimes exciting days, days you just canâ€™t forget.
Well, thereâ€™s one day that Iâ€™ll never, ever be able to forget, whether I want to or not. And that was the day my girlfriend -no scratch that- ex-girlfriend died.
Right after I broke up with her.
* * * *
My heart stopped.
The news wasnâ€™t sinking in; I couldnâ€™t believe it. Just couldnâ€™tâ€¦
My bad excuse for a dad turned the TV off and looked over at me.
He looked uncomfortable as he searched for the right words to say to me. Too bad there were none. Because this was a situation in which words could not be expressed correctlyâ€¦appropriately.
My thoughts quickly registered and I realized how proper my thoughts sounded. I guess Taylor can be blamed for thatâ€¦she was all about using proper grammar and often used big words. Makes sense it stuck with me.
As I thought about her, I realized what was happening.
â€œNo!â€ I gasped.
Dad sighed, getting up from his lounge chair. Without a word, he left the room.
And I hated him more than ever.
I snatched the remote and turned the TV back on. They were still talking about the accident. The crash that killed her, Taylor.
Finally it sunk in how big of a jerk I really was.
She looked so happyâ€¦how was I supposed to do this? It would crush her, break her. Who knows how sheâ€™d react?
But it had to be done, because I couldnâ€™t take this anymore.
â€œWhatâ€™s wrong?â€ Taylor asked, quickly picking up on my mood.
â€œIâ€™m sorry Taylorâ€¦but I think we need to break up.â€ I said, cutting straight to the point. Maybe I was a little too blunt though.
I could already see the tears coming. I was not ready for this. What have I done?
â€œItâ€™s better this way, trust me.â€ I promised her.
â€œTrust you? What kind of line is that? How am I supposed to trust you after you just dumped me? And here I thought that you could have actually have been the one. I canâ€™t believe I let myself fall for you.â€ She turned, tears starting to fall down her cheeks.
It hurt, seeing her like this, knowing Iâ€™m the reason for those tears.
I watched her run off to her car. She got in and it started quickly, she flew out of the school parking lot, swerving a little.
Should I be worried? Noâ€¦Taylor was the safest driver I knew. Sheâ€™d be fine.
Sheâ€™d be fine? What was I thinking?
She wasnâ€™t fine! SHEâ€™S DEAD NOW!
And I couldnâ€™t help thinking about how it was my fault. If I hadnâ€™t broken up with her, she would not have gone spastic and drove while overly emotional. She wouldnâ€™t have gotten into a car accident and died.
Oh my godâ€¦Iâ€™d broken up with her right before she diedâ€¦
* * * *
I lay in bed, starring at the ceiling while wondering why people would not leave me alone.
It was three oâ€™clock in the morning and my phone had been going off ever since the news of Taylorâ€™s death was announced on TV.
People kept trying to call and text me. I didnâ€™t reply, but for some reason I didnâ€™t turn my phone off either.
Maybe it was because the fact that people were trying to talk to me up until three in the morning made it a fact that Taylor really was gone.
I jumped up into a sitting position, my head whipping around frantically, trying to find the source that said my name.
Was this all in my mind? No one was even in here! And the voice sounded a lot like-
My eyes widened as my mind registered what was in front of me.
It was definitely herâ€¦I could see it behind all the blood and scratches that covered her body.
â€œTaylor?â€ I gasped.
She took a step closer to me, and I felt sick. Her clothes were torn and, like her body, drenched in her scarlet colored blood. It was a very disturbing and gory sight, and the pale color of her skin added to the eerie-ness of her appearance.
â€œThis canâ€™t be happening. Youâ€™re dead. I obviously must be dreaming.â€ I said, trying to make sense of this situation.
â€œWrong, right and wrong. This is happening, I am dead, and you are most definitely not dreaming.â€ She corrected me.
â€œWhat- how?â€ I asked.
â€œAm I here? Easy, Iâ€™m a ghost who hasnâ€™t passed over quite yet. I have some unfinished business.â€ She explained, crossing her arms.
â€œThatâ€™s ridiculous, ghosts arenâ€™t real.â€ I think I was trying to convince myself more than her.
â€œGood point, Iâ€™m a spirit then.â€ She smirked.
â€œA spirit?â€ I asked and she nodded. â€œSo are you like haunting me now?â€ I asked, reaching over to turn the light beside my bed on. Maybe then sheâ€™d just disappear.
â€œDid you not hear me before? I have unfinished business! As much as Iâ€™d love to haunt you, I canâ€™t.â€
To my disappointment, when the light turned on, she was still there; I could just see her a little better. And I noticed how she was slightly transparent, just a little. She also had this thin golden glow surrounding her.
â€œSo whatâ€™s you unfinished business?â€ I asked curiously.
â€œI need to know the truth.â€ She stated.
â€œThatâ€™s for another time, Iâ€™ll see you tomorrow Brendon. You should probably get some sleep.â€ And with that, she just disappeared!
Feeling slightly shocked; I pressed the back of my hand to my forehead, checking too see if it was warm. It felt normal though.
I let out a deep sigh, and fell back onto my bed. I reached over and turned the light back off. I closed my eyes and let sleep take me.
* * * *
My eyes snapped open and I gasped. I looked around my room nervously, but I was alone. With a sigh of relief, I relaxed, realizing that last night was just a stupid dreamâ€¦wait, was it all just a dream?
Did Taylor really die?
The question floated around my mind as I got ready for school.
I headed downstairs and my dad was sitting at the kitchen table reading a paper, all dressed up in a suit and tie for work.
Without a word, I walked passed him to get to the cupboard so I could get a box of cereal.
â€œYou donâ€™t have to go to school today.â€ He said, sounded a little stiff.
I closed the refrigerator door, then poured some milk into a bowl.
Horror washed over me as I realized what he was saying.
â€œWhy wouldnâ€™t I go to school?â€ I asked nervously.
He let out a frustrated sigh, and when I turned to shoot him a glance, his thumb and forefinger were holding the bridge of his nose, his eyes tightly closed.
â€œItâ€™s not going to work, so donâ€™t try it.â€ He told me.
â€œTry what?â€ I asked, grabbing my bowl and sitting across from him at the table.
â€œPretending itâ€™s not real, that she isnâ€™t really gone. It will just make it worse Brendon. I tried it when your mother died; it only brought me more misery. The best thing to do is just accept it.â€ He said roughly.
I was speechless. Not because of what he said, but because of how angry I was with him.
Okay, so I guess Taylor really was dead and just the part about her spirit haunting me was a dream.
I ate my cereal quickly, shoving spoonfuls of it into my mouth at a time.
When I was finished I got up and set my bowl in the kitchen sink. I walked out of the kitchen, calling over my shoulder to my father:
â€œYou know, youâ€™re a pretty lousy dad.â€
I pulled my keys out of my pocket, and as I was about to walk out the door, my dad replied to my earlier statement.
â€œI was just trying to help you.â€ He sounded like he was trying to control his anger.
I turned around to face him. â€œHelp me? How the hell were you trying to help me?â€ I demanded, feeling angry myself, oh wait, I already was angry.
He didnâ€™t say anything so I continued. â€œAre you trying to help me get through Taylorâ€™s death, well obviously not! Instead youâ€™re trying to get me to just get over her. And when I found out she did die, all you did was stare at me and then leave. Who does that?â€
â€œI was trying to give you some space! There was nothing for me too say! Nothing I could do!â€ he yelled.
I walked out the door, without saying anything to him, slamming it shut.
I headed over to my truck that I saved up for, for years. I got that instead of a shiny brand new one that my dad wanted to buy for me. I refused, hating his money. The reason for my momâ€™s death.
My father had gone crazy, money crazy, and power crazy. He owned a big business that kept raking in money. He became obsessed, constantly working, practically forgetting about the family. My mom became depressed and dad didnâ€™t see it because he was too distracted by his â€˜needâ€™ for more money.
Eventually my momâ€™s depression got worse and she killed herself.
I blamed my dad, which fueled my hatred for him.
â€œBrendon, you have to stop fighting with you dad.â€
I jumped, causing me too swerve and almost hit a stop sign.
I turned my head, my eye catching Taylor, sitting in the passenger seat.
â€œHoly sh!t!â€ I cursed, trying to control my breathing.
Taylor shook her head slowly, back and forth while tsk-ing me. She hated swearing.
â€œSorry,â€ I mumbled. â€œWoah! Wait! Last night was real?â€ I gasped.
â€œI thought I already explained that to you?â€ she asked.
â€œCan you blame me for wanting to think it was a dream?â€ I asked.
She frowned â€œThat hurt.â€
I sighed. â€œTaylor, I didnâ€™t mean it that wayâ€¦â€
â€œThen why did you break up with me?â€ she asked, I could almost feel the pain in her voice.
â€œIt was for your own good Tay, I thought I already told you that.â€ I muttered, trying to concentrate on my driving.
â€œThatâ€™s not a good excuse Brendon. My own good? Lots of guys use that line!â€
â€œYeah, well this guy actually means it.â€ I argued.
â€œWhy would you mean it? Whatâ€™s so bad about you that says I canâ€™t be with you?â€ she asked, crossing her arms.
Instead of answering her, I changed the subject.
â€œWhy did you say earlier, when you scared the crap outta me, that I had to stop fighting with my dad?â€
â€œBecause you do! Brendon you canâ€™t keep pushing him away like this. Heâ€™s tried so hard to be in your life and you just keep refusing him! It isnâ€™t fair.â€ She insisted.
â€œIsnâ€™t fair? What wasnâ€™t fair was my mom dying, or you dying!â€ I snapped, tightening my grip on the steering wheel.
Taylor reached over and laid her hand over mineâ€¦but I couldnâ€™t feel it.
â€œI know Brendon, but thatâ€™s what happens in life. People come and go. But youâ€™ll be with your mom again someday. And you have me for now.â€ She promised.
â€œHow can I have you, after I broke up with you before you died? That must seriously make me the biggest di- jerk in the universe.â€ I muttered.
â€œYou are not a jerk, or what you were going to say. Yeah you broke up with me, but you must obviously have a good reason to have. And if youâ€™d cooperate Iâ€™d be able to know the reason. When I was still alive I was too blind to realize it, so I tried driving home as overly emotional as I was and I ended up killing myself. But now I have to help you sort out your problemsâ€¦thatâ€™s part of my unfinished business.â€ She explained.
I sighed, pulling into the school parking lot.
As I drove around, looking for a spot to park, I came to a final decision.
â€œScrew this.â€ I mumbled, making a quick U-turn, exiting the parking lot then driving away from school.
â€œWhat are you doing?â€ Taylor asked.
â€œMy dad told me I didnâ€™t have to go to school today, so Iâ€™m not going to, Iâ€™m going to spend it with you.â€ I told her.
I was surprised she didnâ€™t try and argue. She hated it when I skipped school.
â€œSo let me get this straight, youâ€™re dead, but I can still see and talk to you because you need to know â€˜The Truthâ€™ and help me sort out my problems?â€ I asked.
â€œYes. Now letâ€™s get back to the problem of your father.â€ She said.
â€œYeah youâ€™re right, he is a problem.â€ I grumbled.
â€œNot in that context,â€ She scolded.
â€œRight, okay go on.â€ I urged her, just happy to hear her voice.
â€œYou obviously blame your dad for your momâ€™s death,â€ she started
â€œBecause he is.â€ I insisted.
â€œNo, heâ€™s the cause of her depression. It was your motherâ€™s own fault to take her life away. Your father only brought her into a depression for neglecting her, for avoiding any affection; he was too obsessed with power.â€
â€œI already know that.â€ I sighed â€œBut I have to disagree with you, he is the cause of her death because if she wasnâ€™t depressed she wouldnâ€™t have killed herself! And then he has the nerve to always say she was selfish!â€ I growled.
â€œThatâ€™s because she was.â€
My eyes widened and I slammed down on the brakes. I turned to stare at Taylor, she starred back.
â€œWhat did you say?â€ I asked, trying to avoid blowing up in her face.
â€œShe was selfish Brendon. She was selfish by killing herself.â€
â€œNO! Donâ€™t say that!â€ I yelled.
â€œBrendon, this is why Iâ€™m here. Youâ€™re in denial.â€
â€œLIES! GET OUT! Go away!â€ I screamed at her, she didnâ€™t move, nor even flinch.
â€œBrendon, she thought killing herself would be the easiest way out. Yet she was forgetting that her husband still loved her in some way and that it would greatly affect you, and it has. Itâ€™s led you to hating your father for something he couldnâ€™t really control and left you motherless.â€ She said calmly.
And as her words registered in my mind, I realized how true they were.
I didnâ€™t say anything, just drove. The silence wasnâ€™t awkward, more peaceful, like it was supposed to be there.
â€œShouldnâ€™t you be mad at me?â€ I asked suddenly.
â€œI shouldnâ€™t, but I am.â€
I was instantly confused by her words.
â€œWhat?â€ I asked.
â€œI said, I should not be mad at you, but I am. As in, I shouldnâ€™t be mad at you, but I am because you broke my heart. And you never let me help you out with your issues.â€ She explained.
â€œMy issues?â€ I demanded, she gave me a simple nod. â€œWaitâ€¦I broke your heart?â€ I asked, she nodded.
Are you serious? THIS was what I was trying to avoid, breaking her heart. Thatâ€™s why I broke up with her. Wellâ€¦I guess my â€˜issuesâ€™ played a big part in that tooâ€¦
â€œWhen you broke up with me Brendon, it broke my heart, thatâ€™s why I died. Death by a broken heart I guess.â€ She giggledâ€¦she giggled?
â€œWait, so it is my fault youâ€™re dead?â€ I asked.
â€œNO! Thatâ€™s not what Iâ€™m saying.â€ She said.
â€œBut I think it is.â€ I urged with a smirk, she groaned, it was cute.
â€œLook, I was in love with you and then you broke up with me, it was a very painful thing.â€ She sighed.
I felt the urge to comfort her, but how do you comfort a ghost?
â€œI hope you donâ€™t think it was easy for me to break up with youâ€¦Taylor, I loved you too. But I had to do it. I had to break up with you.â€ I whispered, reaching out to caress her face, but my hand went right through her.
â€œYou did love me?â€ her face lit up.
â€œYes.â€ I said truthfullyâ€¦of course I loved her, she was the most amazing girl Iâ€™d ever met and I had wanted a life with her. With Taylor, I could easily picture us getting married, then having kids and growing old together. I know, it sounded ridiculous, corny even, but it was the truth.
But now she was deadâ€¦not entirely goneâ€¦but dead.
We couldnâ€™t do any of those things now.
I glanced over at Taylor just in time to see the grin flash across her face as she realized where we were going.
I parked my truck on the side of the road and turned it off. I got out of the car, and Taylor was at my side, it kinda scared me how quick she moved.
She grabbed my hand, and for a moment, just a moment, I thought I could actually feel her warm soft skin against mine. Like I used to be able to.
As I followed Taylor out onto the sand, I got a good look at her. I noticed how different she looked compared to last night. She wasnâ€™t bloody for one thing, and her cuts and bruises were all gone.
Her light brown hair fell down past her shoulders in loose natural looking curls, and her bangs hung in her face. She wasnâ€™t wearing any makeup, but she still looked like the most gorgeous thing in the world to me.
She had on a white dress that hung a little past her knees and she had no shoes on, leaving her feet bare.
Taylor let go of my hand, and ran for the water.
She stopped before the water reached her dress, and the waves crashed lightly against her legs.
I chuckled to myself, walking towards the shoreline.
Taylor spread her arms out wide and closed her eyes, taking in a breath of air.
Her eyes opened and she shot me one of her signature smiles.
I knew she was happy, she was always happy when we came here.
Taylor -gracefully- stepped out of the water.
She glanced over at me, then laid back on the sand.
I sat down beside her and starred out at the water. The sun was reflecting off of it, making me squint my eyes from the brightness.
â€œLetâ€™s talk.â€ She said softly.
â€œAgain?â€ I asked with a playful smirk. She rolled her eyes.
â€œWhy did you break up with me Brendon?â€ She asked, her words echoing through my mind.
I shifted away from her, feeling slightly uncomfortable. This wasnâ€™t what I wanted to talk about.
â€œJust answer me, please. As my last wish.â€ She whispered with a hint of sadness in her voice.
I sighed and decided it be best to just let her know.
â€œI didnâ€™t deserve a girl like you. Iâ€™m not a good kid. I get in trouble in school, I donâ€™t have the best grades, and I block my own family out. I bully kids, and lately Iâ€™ve been angry for the stupidest things. I see how my actions affect you. Iâ€™ve heard some things too. We were too different Tay.â€ I sighed.
â€œWe made it work though.â€ She said.
â€œYeah, but things were hard and you know that. Sure we have had a lot of happy moments and times, but when it comes down to it Iâ€™m a lousy boyfriend. Especially when Iâ€¦hit youâ€¦last week.â€ I choked the last sentence out, feeling so ashamed.
â€œHey, I forgave you for that. You were mad and werenâ€™t thinking straight, it didnâ€™t help that I interfered.â€ She told me, carefully.
â€œSo what! That doesnâ€™t make a difference! I never should have touched you like that. You know, I wanted things to work, but I couldnâ€™t be perfect for you and thatâ€™s what went wrong with me.â€ I admitted.
â€œNo ones perfect Brendon, you know that.â€
â€œYou are Taylor.â€
She laughed quietly, and smiled at me. â€œNo Iâ€™m not. Brendon Iâ€™m far from perfect. I have my flaws just like everyone else.â€
â€œYouâ€™re perfect to me.â€ I confessed.
A tear slipped down Taylorâ€™s cheek, and I wanted to wipe it away, but when I tried my hand went straight through her face.
â€œGhosts can cry?â€ I questioned with a half-hearted smile.
â€œOh Brendon.â€ She laughed softly.
We were silent for a minute as I starred at her pretty face, thinking.
â€œYou know,â€ I began â€œYou were right, about my mom being selfish. I just never realized it before.â€ I admitted. â€œAnd, I think I can kinda see my dadâ€™s point of view now. I mean, she left him to raise me on his own. And I donâ€™t think he ever really wanted to be a father to begin with. It must be hardâ€¦especially when I act the way I act around him.â€
â€œHe loves you though Brendon.â€ Taylor spoke.
â€œReally? How do you know?â€ I asked, my tone neither sarcastic nor angry like it normally would have been. It sounded more curious. Honestly curious.
â€œI can tell. I can see it. And now that Iâ€™m dead, I can see it more than ever. He does care about you, and he keeps trying to make things right, he just doesnâ€™t know how. He needs a little more help and less sarcasm.â€ She hinted, making me smile a bit.
â€œI guess your right.â€ I agreed. She smiled again.
Another moment of silence grew over us, and that gave me time to think of the right things to say to her. To let her know how I felt.
â€œTaylorâ€¦I love you so much, and I just want you to know that I am so sorry for everything wrong Iâ€™ve ever done to you and everyone else. I wish I had listened to you when-â€œ I stopped, taking a deep, shaky breath. â€œ-You were still alive. I feel like Iâ€™ve made a huge mistakeâ€¦no, lots of them.â€ I couldnâ€™t stop the tears that spilled over my eyes.
This was the first time Iâ€™d ever let Taylor see me cryâ€¦and to be honest, I donâ€™t think Iâ€™ve cried since my mom diedâ€¦and I was 12 when that happened.
I buried my face in my hands and just cried, letting all the emotions out that had been bottled up for all those years.
I felt a hand against my shoulder, and then I was pulled into someoneâ€™s arms. I opened my eyes and saw that it was Taylor holding me! Taylor! I could actually feel her!
â€œThatâ€™s right, let it all out. Everything is going to be okay.â€ She said soothingly, rubbing my back.
â€œI-I can feel you.â€ I breathed, feeling astonished. She nodded.
We were quiet again, as I tried controlling my sobs.
â€œSing to me.â€ She said suddenly, I starred at her, feeling a little confused and shocked.
â€œSing to me Brendon, itâ€™ll help make you feel better.â€ She promised. And then, a guitar was in her hands. She handed it to me and I just starred at it, thinking of the right song, and then I got it.
â€œI got these memories, theyâ€™re all of you and me
Iâ€™ve been recording them ever since I was seventeen
Push playback then rewind
I see us meeting for the very first timeâ€
As I sang, I remembered just about every memory I had with Taylorâ€¦well mostly the good ones. She smiled as I sang, which made me smile.
â€œThe first time that I saw your face
The first time that you spoke my name
The first time that I heard you say
Thereâ€™s a first time with me everyday
The first time that I felt your touch
The first time I couldnâ€™t get enoughâ€
As I got further into the song, I watched Taylor slowly turn more and more transparent, as if she were disappearing. Tears fell down my face, but I continued singing in a clear and strong voice.
I didnâ€™t want to loose her, not again.
â€œNo matter what I do
I won't fast forward anything with you
I know you feel it too
The first time I saw love I was with youâ€
Taylor still had a smile on her face, but in a way it was full of sadness and I think she may have been crying too.
I took a deep breath as I sang the last part of the song.
â€œThe first time that I saw your face
The first time that you spoke my name
The first time when we talked all night
Was the first time love made sense in lifeâ€
I paused, forcing myself to finishâ€¦for Taylor.
â€œThe first time that I felt your touch
The first time I couldnâ€™t get enough
The first time that I heard you say
Thereâ€™s a first time with me everydayâ€
My guitar disappeared and a bright light broke through the sky, nearly blinding me. Taylor stood up, and I did too.
Taylor was barely there, being more see-through than she ever had before.
This frightened me.
She gently wiped the tears from her face and smiled.
â€œThat was beautiful.â€ She whispered.
â€œAnd it was all true, and about you of course.â€ I told her truthfully.
â€œBrendon, I need you to promise me a few things.â€ She said.
Oh noâ€¦promises meant leavingâ€¦no she couldnâ€™t leave me. Not again.
â€œPromise me, youâ€™ll make things better with your father. â€œ She started.
â€œAlso, promise you will try and be a better person, not perfect, but make good decisions.â€
I nodded again.
â€œAnd finally, promise you wonâ€™t ever forget me, but that you will move on, find someone new to love, and promise youâ€™ll treat her right.â€
I cried again. Then shook my head.
â€œBrendon.â€ She said my name softly.
â€œI wonâ€™t ever forget youâ€¦but I donâ€™t think I could ever move on.â€ I croaked.
She smiled lovingly, cocking her head to the side a little.
â€œPromise me.â€ She pleaded.
I took a deep breath. â€œI promise Iâ€™ll try.â€
Her lips pressed to mine, and I was surprised I could feel her again.
They were soft, and gentle feeling. A very careful, yet love filled kiss.
â€œI love you Brendon, remember that.â€
â€œDonâ€™t leave me, not again. Please.â€ I begged, tears continuing to fall from my face.
â€œI have no choice, my mission has been completed and now I must go into the light. Youâ€™ll see me again someday, I promise.â€ She said, her words sounding powerful. And then something truly amazing happened.