my first anime

ok so i finally decided to start writing my anime so i figured id let everybody who commented have the first draft warning most of the charecters are female comment on what you think of the first chapter and ill write more if i get good comments but be honest i need good and bad criticism if i plan to become a better writer

Chapter 2

awakining

when i awoke laying on a soft bed something smelled badly like fire smoke every part of my body was aching and i could tell there were people in the room i slowly started to sit up when a pair of hands caught me thinking it was vixen i gave her a big hug but then a voice ive never heard before said exuse me sir why are you hugging me. i looked at the stunning young woman and three things were going through my head one where the hell was i two where was vixen and three who the hell was this lady that i had just hugged thats when i realized i had nothing but a pair of shorts on and another woman had entered the room i wasnt imbarrased i just wanted a shirt so i asked the young woman i had hugged to get me a shirt once the first woman left the second who was older and clearly had seen her fair share of agony asked me if i knew where i was i exsplained that i had no idea all that i remember was that i was almost killed she gave me a long puzzled look then asked me to exsplain how i had gotten there i told her and she seemed to act like it was a real story i wouldent blame her if she didnt belive me then she said something that cought me off guard she started telling me that how i had come to this world was normal accually thats how most people that were children of demons or angels had gotten there at this point i started questoning my sanity then the younger girl came into the room with a white linin shirt i thanked her and asked for her name she said it was dezza and sat down in one of the chairs then the older woman started talking again she said that only children of demons or angels could enter this world and we were half breeds she also exsplained that eather my parent didnt know i existed or whoever my parent was had just acnolaged me as one of theres which isnt a good thing she emphasised this with great dread in her eyes then i had just remembered that i hadent even asked where my clothes had gone or where vixen went or even the other womans name so i figured id take the conveersation to vixen first then worry about other things so i asked what the womans name was she said it was jonnah and as for vixen she said that they had figured out who her parent was and they didnt know what she could do as far as her powers went plus not knowing who my parent was they wanted to wait and see over night when i asked how they were going to figure it out jonnah said that she would have one of her sorrcers watch me over night and do tests while i slept with magic so my body wouldent be harmed i then asked about my clothes and dezza said when i found you you were laying on the ground coverd in hellfire your clothes were mostly burnt away and your friend was crying over you she thought you had died but i was certen you wernt i meen anybody that can kill a artirac demon has to be stronge and you didnt just kill it you burt it to a crisp by the way how did you do that summon hellfire i meen even jonnah cant do that and she is a summoner i looked at her and said i have no idea it just happened it came from inside my soal it felt like she gave me a stunned look and got up and said exuse me for the rest of the night i couldent sleap i had to meny questions and no one had been in my room for the rest of the day and then i fell asleap around 10:30 by my watches time

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